Like most of America, I sat through the results of the election last week with anticipation and concern. In my 20 years as a voting adult, I’ve never felt this way. Of course, I’ve dabbled in both hyperabsorption and abstinence of the media’s coverage. The result is the same: I don’t know how to feel about all of this (– probably because I feel too much).
A few days later, Holly and I ran through some of her favorite communicators and their topics. She shared that one in particular – an author gaining in national renown and encouraging thousands of women daily by her posts and speaking – recently confessed her love for another woman. It was the first time I witnessed a Christian woman/leader redefining her sexuality on such a public stage.
Now, there was no “coming out” parade. Conversely, there were no heralds of blasphemy or rebuke. She simply identified that she is in love with a (particularly well known – besides the fact) woman. I asked Holly, “How does this make you feel?” And she said, “I don’t know.”
To use the word confused would certainly come to mind for me. But I don’t think it’s that really.
So let’s look at the Inside-Out top 5: Am I sad? Not exactly, it’s hard to be sad for someone who feels the love from companionship when she never thought she could. Am I happy? No. Angry or afraid? Not really. Disgusted? Not at her choice, but maybe at how it’s being easily accepted by the Christian community.
I think we struggle with our feelings on the current climate of political discourse and those of sexuality, gender identity, and relationships because we stress too much how we ought to feel.
The reality is we ought to feel a lot. It’s how God made us. In the beauty of his divine design, He bestowed upon us the attributes of himself – physically and emotionally. We understand this in its base form when someone says they have “fallen in love”; we recognize the beauty of that sentiment. God is love (1 John 4:8), so the recognition of “love” is something – at least in our basic English understanding – beautiful. However, if I were to say (and I’m not!!!), “I love my wife…and I love another woman” – this stirs concern in you and rightfully so. As a result, I hope, you would articulate a loving, biblical response and walk with me through grace and truth.
A biblical response here is key. In the example above, we know of God’s best for marriage because of His Creation narrative as a design of holy companionship (Gen 2:24), which I understand as between one man and one woman. But that speaks only to my covenant relationship, not my feelings. So it will take a concerted realignment of my heart to understand that even though I love this hypothetical other person, it is outside of God’s design for my holy relationship with Holly.
I end my thought here with this: our feelings usually influence our opinions. Our opinions, then, are simply that… ours. This means they will continue to conflict with each other and even our biblical knowledge and tradition because they stem from our own motives and desires. That’s our world. That’s our reality.
But there is also another.
In June 2015, the Supreme Court of the United States published their ruling on Obergefell v. Hodges, and as a result, effectively legalizing same-sex unions nationwide. With this new “law of the land” change, I preached a sermon and was terrified that I was supposed to address this monumental decision. Across the country, preachers did the same. Some spoke. Some led their congregations in prayer. Some rejoiced. Some tweeted. And I was silent on the issue.
Later that night, Holly and I visited Passion City Church and joined with thousands in worship. Pastor Louie Giglio admitted what I too had felt, yet his words assuaged my tongue-tied heart. He said (and I paraphrase here), the best thing he can do as a follower of Christ is to read God’s opinions in scripture. And as a pastor, his obligation is to communicate God’s opinions from scripture. He then went on to preach his prepared message.
Now, that doesn’t mean that he or the thousands of pastors across the country sat in silence out of fear or shame of the Gospel. It means that they…we accept the Kingdom reality that God’s opinions are authoritatively set above all others – a matter of fact that will continue to be incomprehensible and incompatible to agnostic intellectuals…or even professing evangelicals. It means that when I lead correctly, I will tell only what I know God gives me to tell. And of my feelings, I can be assured that God understands and allows for me to feel everything I feel about the issues and perplexities around us.
This leads me to prayer and reflection, to examine my own heart, to repent for my actions, inactions, and thoughts. And friends, I confess I do not do this consistently enough. Yet, when I do, this saves me from the abyss of despair, rage, prejudice, terror, or even ecstasy. For as a communicator of God’s authoritative word, I set my mind at ease that I can trust Him and more often than not, accept that my opinions will continue to shift, while God’s will stay the same.
When the day comes when I open my mouth to declare his promises and truth, I want to be the man who will speak what is his and not what is mine. That way, how I feel, will pale in comparison to the power and beauty of what I know to be true.
We met the pastor of the small community – Pastor German (“Herman”) and his wife, Enith, and began preparing for the local church service. From that morning and throughout the next few days, I was perplexed at the small size of 8 or so adults attending services or classes. There were very few young adults, a couple of teenagers, and around 30 children.
Not Just a Corner 